Letter from "other mother"....

"Yes – I have Leukemia. It has returned – 5 years later. It is AML (Acute Myeloid Leukemia). Currently – there are no cancer cells in my blood system – only in my bone marrow. The cancer cell count is at 6%. It takes 20% to be called “Cancer” – so right now they are labeling me “pre-cancer” and have estimated that I have 3 to 6 months to live if I go untreated. Although – even with treatment – my chances of dying are up there because last time I went through this – I almost died 2x due to infection.

So – I am looking at this as a death sentence and planning to wrap up my estate. But here is what I want you to know:

1. I know that if I do die – I will be going home to live with my Father in Heaven where I will be re-united with Ina (my mother-in-law), Grandma Lou, Aunt Kathy, Brother Michael, Mom & Dad, my dog Kuma, my dog Cori, as well as many others who have gone before me and will be there with open arms when I return home.

2. If I do die – it is His will – not mine and He must have His reasons. I know He loves me and wants only the best for me so for whatever reason I am to return to Him – it must needs be, I trust Him and know that I will be OK.

3. I have lived many lives – I have been a lover, wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, and friend to many people. I have been a hippie. I have hopped freight trains. I have seen many hall of fame rock bands and blues artists live. I have been to rock festivals. I met Little Richard and JP Patches. I have river rafted, snow skied, kayaked in Mexico, snorkeled in Maui, rock climbed, camped and hiked. I love the outdoors. I love animals. I’ve been to a tavern with my Grandma when she was 82 years old. I learned to play the Viola when I was 45 years old. I have my own business and know many wonderful people as clients. I have my name in a tile at the Public Market in Seattle. I have seen paradise on earth. I love to sing. I love to dance. I have no regrets. I have danced.

4. I also know that there is life after death. I was raised Athiest. But as I was taking the Missionary lessons – I had angels put their hands on my shoulders in support of me – so that I could say “no” to the bottle of wine that was being passed around the table. I saw 2 angels between eye blinks telling me to decease my abominable actions and why. I did not stop and they went away for years. I had a blessing from heaven and was given the gift of abstinence. I was told to buy gloves on my way to Seattle and then got stuck in a snow bank on my way home and used the gloves to dig my way out. There is much I do not understand – but I have been shown and proved that there is life after life. I have been shown that God loves me and I am important to Him.

5. I have learned to love people. I have learned to forgive people as well as myself (that’s the hardest one). I have cursed God for making my heart so big because it makes my hurts so much greater. Sometimes I want to go back to my “numb” days where I didn’t care about anyone and nobody cared about me. Life did not hurt so much. But neither was I really living.

6. Sometimes it feels like He is training me to be a Warrior in Heaven. He has put many obstacles, lessons, hardships and stress in my life. He has toughened me up to do His work. He has caused me to study Demons and Evil Spirits – I believe so that I can fight them. I know this sounds crazy – but I am very proud of my idiosyncrasies – thank you. Sometimes I’m an idiot, sometimes I sin and sometimes I’m crazy – thus “idiosyncarsies” describes me well.

7. So here is my “FINAL WISHES LIST” for anyone who wants to volunteer to help make my dreams come true:

a. I want to make a book about my life but in the form of a Children’s Book – simple and silly. I need someone to work with me to illustrate it.

b. I want a web page or blog where I can post my progress and such – Kathryn???

c. I want someone(s) to help me write (dictate) goodby letters friends and family.

d. I want someone to help me with my will. I have a program but then what?

e. I want someone to compile my favorite music.

f. Can someone help walk my dogs later on when I can’t?

g. I need my business web page updated.

h. I need my photos organized.

i. I need my writings organized.

j. ANYTHING ELSE YOU CAN THINK OF??????

THANK YOU - I LOVE YOU!!!! REALLY!!! I DO!!!"

-Sandra